Oh Relapse.....I have NOT missed you.  Why did you decide to show up now?  You have been a constant pain in the patooty and I really am beginning to despise you.  MS has a way of making me crazy from time to time.  This is one of them.  I woke up a few months ago experiencing a "zing" sensation in my head.  Similar to hitting your funny bone, but instead I get a sudden jolt of vibration and an electrical shock sensation followed by overwhelming immediate dizziness and all the while a constant headache accompanies me as my new companion. 

Funny enough, I seem to think I am invincible.  I ignore the head issues, the fatigue and the leg cramps that signify I am doing too much. After all...I  had company for a few weeks in December, I started a new job; in addition to teaching water aerobics.  I had to say good-bye to my son who was deployed and now lives in Japan.....half way around the world.   Now I am helping another son as his friend fights the last few weeks battling cancer.

 Life is crazy, way too busy and I am honestly just too busy to be dealing with you too Mr. Relapse!!

With that said, Relapse didn't care.  He showed up anyhow.  One day I wake up dizzy, it gets worse.  I finally see the Neurologist.  The doctor tells me that he is worried....that the lesions in my spine are a huge concern. Not only did I find out that my lesion on C2 is in a very compromising position; but that the one located at C4-5 is also a endangering my ability to continue to be mobile.  Hmmmm....reality check!!   So, the doctor immediately puts me on steroids.  An IV double dose which take up the remainder of the evening.  The plan was to rush me to have an MRI, some blood work and hopefully get me started on the drug Tysabri.  WOW....I only wanted to get my annual check up!

OK, so now I am full of steroids.  Nothing has improved.  My head is giving me those lovely vibrating sensations almost constantly.  If they were labor pains, they'd be so close I'd be giving birth.  So, now I wait....wait for the results of the MRI.  The big fated answer of whether or not I am going to be labeled as Progressive with my MS and not just relapsing-remitting.

 So, for now I decide I will keep fighting no matter what the outcome is.  If I have to fight, I fight harder.  Life is not just about what happens to you, it is about how you chose to handle the things you are given. The outcome of those choices becomes your "life".  Hopefully the life and legacy that one day you will be proud to look back on. 

In the meantime, I hope you will join me in my boycott of MS and of all the many diseases and afflictions that affect us all.  I am sick and tired of trying to stay positive.  HA HA.  :) 
(That is why chocolate was invented I think..)